Maybe most of us like to quit our job if we could. We constantly dream about it, but that’s about as far as we get-dreaming. Working a 9-5 just seems inevitable. I, Bochok Tabo, however am a master at defying the inescapable. I gaze ‘The Inescapable’ in the face and call him dirty names. I say, if you like to stop working, STOP WORKING; The following are the five reasons why you should.
1. If you stop working you’ll have more time to devote to reading my articles, columns, and lists. This will enable me to become a trademark name down at the Unemployment and Welfare offices. My fame is a small price to pay for you living your dreams. You’ll think of this when you see me on TV shows today.
2. There’s a great feeling in quitting your job. You’ll be in cloud nine in 10 minutes, you’ll be on top of the world, you’ll have a good life, you’ll be: -insert your own line of though here-. Then the worries start about the mortgage, school tuition, groceries, and and how you’re going to pay the amount you owe to other companies. All this will bring depression up to the extent of attempting suicide, but at least you had 10 minutes of freedom.
3. Daytime television is considered the most exciting and captivating television around. You’ll wonder how come you get to survive without all those documentaries, quality soap operas, judge shows, talk shows, and judge shows where you suspect that the judge has beed paid. Combine this with all the educational TV ads that air during the daytime that will ”Get a degree from home’, ‘Make $1,000 a day answering emails’,'Learn the Internet in 2 hours’ in such exciting fields as GED preparation and septic tank scrubber’ and you’ll not just think why you didn’t leave your job sooner, you promise you won’t get back to work again.
4. In your previous job you missed all those important calls from collection agencies and other bill collectors. Now that you have quit your job you’ll be able to sit at home in eager anticipation of these oh-so-important calls. Toss in a few telemarketers, calls from various associations begging for donations, and a few of those computers that call you and ask you to ‘Hold for an important message’ and you’ll have a full day of just answering the phone. It’s like having a job again, without all the hassle of getting a paycheck.
5. Dragging yourself to wake up daily at 5:30 in the morning is not good for your health. Your physician will proud of you for caring enough about your body’s well-being to go as far as resigning from your job. He will not, however, see you as a patient anymore because you no longer have health insurance. We have free clinics though, and you don’t have to worry. Sitting all day in a damp clinic waiting room next to young teenagers diagnosed with Gonorrhea is yet another experience you would have missed out on if you keep working on your present job.
There you have it folks. 5 raesons why you should go out and leave your job. Have a free feeling to say these to your employer when you handle your resignation. If she wants to know where in the world you get that information tell her that a unselfish friend gave them to you free of charge, and all I wanted in return was that you remember me when you get your septic tank scrubbed next time…
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